Today is Father's Day, and the one thing historically I see on social media on Father's Day that is not replicated on Mother's day, is well wishes or praise for the woman that was a single mother. There are a few reasons as to why this is so. Some people had no model of a father in their childhood. Others need to feel validated on a holiday their peers are justified in celebrating, so they inject their personal experience to feel included. Then there are the bitter unforgiving types that can't let go of the past.
So, why do we celebrate all the single Mama's on Father's Day but dont turn around and thank single fathers for being compassionate, kind and gentle on Mother's Day? I dont think it's because the single fathers out there just dont do capable enough jobs to fill in the gap of the female family member. I think it is because the importance and office of father is not respected or understood by those that are hurt in a broken family. The feminist ideology is a moral requirement in our American Culture in place of Patriotism and Family values.
I get it, so please dont tell me I don't know what I'm talking about. I used to buy my single mom a Father's Day gift. I was never discouraged to do that. I heard all too often of how hard she worked, how HE was the one that left us, and she had to do everything. After becoming an adult and having my eyes enlightened by the love of God and fear of the Lord, I have an understanding of the Ten Commanments and the admonishment to "Honor thy Father."
I also have a beautiful awe of the office of Father. God softened my heart enough to release me to let go of a bitter and accusing heart. I traded hurt for love and that gave me a grateful heart for my time I did have with my Daddy and the other father figures he put in my life. I've had two very manly, Godly strong Pastors in my life that Fathered me. No woman was created to model the office of Father. They can model the love of the Father, but they cant mimick the office. How crazy would it be if a man tried to tell you what it is like to nurse an infant? My Fathers (including my Daddy) were stern when needed, loving , and always pointing me to The Father. They also loved and honored their wives, giving no place for seperation from outside influences. These men have humbled themselves to the teachings and leadership of other women. They weren't misogynist, sexist, perverts or abusers. They respect women. If you haven't seen a man do that, it is not God's fault and it doesnt mean that good men dont exist. It could just mean your eyes are blinded by judgements you have made, and you willed your heart to be robbed of gratefullness.
My daddy made mistakes, there was a divorce, and my daddy still loved me. If life were simple, that would be the end of it, but when human emotion and cultural influence come into play, things get dirty. Satan does not really care if you were hurt by a sinful earthly father. What he cares about is that you are not able to be with your Heavenly Father because of YOUR sin. Unforgiveness is one of the easiest sins a Christian can fall into and still feel very righteously justified.
Social media is designed to encourage us to want to be a part of the conversation. But God doesnt let us off the hook when the words are typed. Father's Day is not a religous holiday required by God, but his commandment to "Honor thy Father," does not take vacation so you can interject your personal hurt or make unforgiving jabs at the man that God chose to father you. You don't have to approve of anyone's lifestyle in order to honor them. In fact, if you are operating under unforgiveness towards either parent, you are not honoring them, and I can guarantee that your life is NOT going well with you.
Exodus 20:12 Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.
If you are encouraging others to not honor their parents, you are held accountable and God will deal with you. If you have read the Bible for any considerable amount of time, you understand the difference betwwen blessings and curses. If you are really good, you might have even heard that the one commandment that has a promise attached to it is, "Honor thy Mother and Father."
The next bit of wisdom I can offer victims is,
"You reap what you sow."
Parenting is hard, relationships are work, and if you don't want to be remembered by your mistakes, flaws and wrong actions, put the hurtful memories of an earthly father to rest by using your tongue to forgive and release. If you don't want to reap seeds of dishonor by others, stop dishonoring God's creation and order.
If you are jealous of the girl that was called Princess as a little girl, or the woman that is still passionately in love with her faithful Husband of 25 years dont hate; celebrate!
Rejoice with those who rejoice!
Today, I honor all the men that choose to come home everyday, that have changed diapers, held their ground when needing to doll out discipline, and make Family the most important thing in their life. Happy Father's Day.